Most friendships start with a common interest or a shared passion, but my friendship with Laura Collins Downing started with Desperation: I needed to fit into a dress. I was barely eating yet getting larger and larger. I did not know what was happening to me, but I was NOT going to settle for “it’s an age thing”.

I know a million gorgeous, strong and radiant women in their 50’s. Just because a woman is close to 50 doesn't mean she is doomed to a life of misery and Mom Jeans. I only wanted to lose weight, but instead I found in Laura a biochemistry teacher, health coach, spiritual seeker, psychologist, motivational sports trainer, comedian and cheerleader all wrapped up in one. Lucky me, Laura Collins Downing really is all that, and more: she’s an awesome friend, too.

The second-to-youngest of nine children, Laura grew up in the Berkshires, moved away and then moved back in 2012. Her parents were also "born and bred" in the Berkshires. Her father, Bernard, was a veterinarian and, like Laura, was the eighth child of nine. Together, he and Laura's mom Ann [nee O'Connell] ran Collins Veterinary Hospital from their 36 acre family home in Lee, [which had been the summer home to Queen Wilhelmina of the Netherlands].

Laura's parents instilled in their children a sense of fun, hard work and meaning and their little army of nine knew how to roll up their sleeves and get to work. They all learned from an early age how to pitch in and put others - and animals - first. If you look at all of them today, you can see it still holds true, and that's possibly the greatest legacy any parents could hope to achieve.

Health and Fitness are a part of Laura's DNA as much as her Destiny. In 1980, she was the first-ever graduate from Lee High School to earn all twelve Varsity letters [in field hockey, basketball, softball]. She's been in the health and fitness industry for 28 years, and loves what she’s doing. There is a perfect give-and-take to her life that offers her a chance to learn from others as well as to teach and inspire others to adopt new ways to find health and wellness.

Laura and me, after a 10 mile morning pilgrimage in France

Seems there is always a line outside her door. Laura thrives in high gear so it's no wonder she bought a house right in the center of things, directly across from the Morris Elementary School. She doesn't even flinch over the morning school-run back ups blocking her drive and enjoys watching the summer Tanglewood traffic stream by. There is a reason so many of us find our way to Laura. As a health coach, fitness instructor, and owner of Ideal Protein Weight Loss Clinic in Lenox, MA, she’s very good at what she does.

She makes sense out of the madness of losing weight. I use ‘madness’ lightly, but think about it – helping people change what they do, what they eat, and how they look at themselves and their relationship with food is nothing short of performing a frontal lobotomy. Laura gives dietary ‘lobotomies’ AND makes it fun. Now, that’s a rare gift.

From the moment you walk into Laura's “office” - a large farmer’s table in her front room - you immediately inhale the spirit of “I can.”

On your first visit, Laura spends time going through the science of the Ideal Protein Plan and how it applies to you. You leave with a powerful image of the 3 energy tanks that fuel the human body – SUGAR, FAT, and PROTEIN. Our bodies burn sugar first. When there is no sugar left to burn, then we will burn fat because fat burns faster than protein. It’s important to keep your protein tank full so the body burns the fat off, not the muscle.

OK. Got it. Now, let’s rock ‘n roll!

1) Empty the sugar tank [and keep it empty]

2) Fill up the protein tank

3) Watch the fat tank empty. *

* To illustrate this, Laura has 5lb and 20lb ‘weights,’ disgusting chunks of blubber on the table for people to pinch and get an even better image of the fat they are shedding. She also has a more palatable 20lb bag of winter Ice Melter for you to lift. It’s an amazing, albeit awkward correlation.

It’s one thing to read up on different diets, but it’s another thing entirely to read up and then know exactly which diet is best for you. That's why I needed help and Laura was THE person to make sense of it and to help me turns things around. Turns out, I wasn't eating enough. My metabolism had shut done. Now here's the kicker: on the new diet I would be required to eat more than I ever had before. At the end of the eight weeks, I didn't just lose 20 pounds, I gained my life back, and I am never going to let it go. I LOVE MY LIFE!

“Gained my life back”? Through Laura’s help I was able to discover the single most important thing on my journey to wellness: sugar augments my pain. The correlation was so obvious yet profoundly difficult to reach. I would never have discovered it on my own. When my sugar tank emptied, my pain went away. It was a most welcomed signpost on my way-too-confusing journey to wellness, one that I had not expected to see. What a relief to know that the cause of my pain was not something "big" like my PTSD or Hypothyroidism. It's just SUGAR, and I can control how much of it I allow into my system.

Who knew a diet could be fun?! Laura’s optimism is ridiculously contagious. When you walk in the room, she lights up and blasts you with a glorious compliment. Immediately you feel good and relaxed about getting on the scale. She’s the same when teaching a fitness class. She calls attention to what is positive in everyone there. She will shout out your name and celebrate your strength, and because she celebrates you, it sends ripples out and everyone else in the class gives a subliminal, sweaty nod to you, too.

It's all about you. Remarkably outgoing and upbeat, Laura is surprisingly shy and has a superhuman ability to deflect attention away from her so that it shines back on to others. When you take one of her turbo-charged classes at Lenox Fitness you can’t miss her. Her bright neon sportswear and headbands are rallying calls to Boot Camp. The class is packed and everyone is psyched for the hour of hard-core training because they know they are going to get something out of it – STRENGTH.

From the moment Laura switches on her headset and starts the class, the focus is on YOU. While she moves around the class, she keeps you focused and "in your zone." While you're sweating to the JNL* [*Jennifer Nicole Lee] battle cries of ‘Strong is the New Skinny,’ and ‘Kiss my Abs,’ Laura bounces through exercises as though weightless and skipping down the lane with a balloon in her hand.

Laura cracks jokes and reassures the boys that if they are wobbly with their balance they might be getting their period and reminds the ladies to wear a wee-wee pad for the jumping jacks. It’s hilarious. It’s also amazing to watch her in action and think: “Wow she is a really good teacher. I am lucky I found her. ” You don’t ever once think “oh, she is so strong. I will never be fit like her.” Laura keeps your focus right where it should be: on you, beautiful you.

No Judgement. Laura is an effective motivator in and out of class. She encourages everyone to ditch the self-judgment. It gets in the way of everything. And she’s right. Everyone knows I've never been to the gym, and the only weights I lift are grocery bags. I prefer to be outdoors, but Laura inspired me to push myself beyond my comfort zone and try her JNL* Fusion class at Lenox Fitness.

JNL focuses on eight 3-minute “cycles” that are half cardio, half strength with one-minute breaks in between. Up until 3 weeks ago, I was too frightened to take an intense fitness class. Fearing my core was not strong enough, I avoided all things “muscle-y” thinking they might trigger my fibromyalgia or give me "Earl Campbell thighs," but years doing Pilates paid off. JNL Fusion did not leave me in pain for days. I was sore, but in a very good way.

Shiny Happy Good Girls after one of Laura's class

Whether she’s teaching a class or weighing you, Laura always focuses on the positive. Through her constructive example, you learn to look at the process of losing weight less as a schedule to follow and more as a script to learn. Soon, looking after your health becomes more natural. You learn to love your body for what it is and forgive it for what it is not. You learn to stop and feed yourself throughout the day. You no longer blow through your body’s need to be nourished. You no longer skip meals and soon you choose to eat well. Nothing is more important than nourishing our bodies and minds. When we are strong and healthy, we live and love completely.

Laura really does stop and chill. Here she is, journalling in France and in the shade at Le Lac du Verdon — Laura really does stop and chill. Here she is, journalling in France and in the shade at Le Lac du Verdon

Life gets hectic and sometimes we forget to eat or we don’t eat the right things. We all need to learn how to stop and listen to our bodies and make the time to care for ourselves. I look back and wonder how I allowed myself to push to the side something so critical to life as eating the right things in the right way. Seriously, how does that happen? Like many, I was wrapped up in a rhythm of choices that breathlessly rushed me from one thing to the next, never nourishing only depleting.

Working through an effective diet plan with Laura reversed all that for me. The experience empowered me to change the rhythm of my life - to stop and eat, to slow down to make unhurried, healthy choices so that I could reclaim my health and my life - in that order. Once fueled with awareness [and Protein], I could take ownership of my bright and happy future.

Eating well in France [Laura has just biked a million miles on this day. We didn't]

We are all different, but when it comes to weight loss, “whatever works best for you” is the greatest common denominator. It doesn’t really matter what plan you choose to follow as long as the process improves your understanding and acceptance of what your body needs.

A diet is a course of action that teaches you healthy patterns of self-care as part of a no-longer-dysfunctional relationship with food. No wonder the French call it "le regime". For me, Laura Collins Downing coupled with The Ideal Protein Plan was exactly what I needed. When I started the diet, I was only thinking about a dress. I had no idea I would get a life, too.

I am forever grateful to my dear friend Laura Collins Downing whose humor, sound advice and knowledge brought me back to a place of happiness and strength and showed me that I really could have a life and live well without pain.

Sometimes you just have to slow down, to get a life. Go, Good Girl, Go!